So I have chosen to come back to blogging!
2019 has been a crazy year.
I have had to take a break over this season due to various commitments, but if I’m totally honest, my mental health has been pretty crap.
Fear of rejection.
Fear of not making an impact.
Fear of comments.
Fear of people finding out I’m not perfect at this simplifying journey.
These are all ridiculous ideas looking back. I never intended to write this blog as a guide to get things perfect. Instead, to mark the journey, we have gone on as a family to make our lived more intentional, more simple, more meaningful.
I have said yes to more commitments… But my mental health has deteriorated.
I have got a new job… But have isolated myself.
I have begun to think less about the cost of items… And I have spent more money, lost more space, and felt overwhelmed.
It is at this point that I would tell you that I have it all sorted now. That I have managed to turn it around, and by magic, I have returned to a more simple life.
Unfortunately, that isn’t the case.
You see, the thing will mental illness is that it robs you of confidence. It raises the bar of attainment to perfection; anything less is a failure. It creates fear over the voices and opinions of others and creates a bubble of self-hate.
So here I am, at the end of 2019, with 31 days left, declaring that this year has been a good year. A few bad months cannot overwhelm the rest of the 8 good months! As a family, we have made some mistakes along the way, but we still have the values which we have instilled into our DNA. We have remained intentional at times when we wouldn’t have before. We have reduced our carbon footprint, even by a little, and have removed excess from our lives.
This journey to simplicity does not have a destination. My journey through the storms and silence of mental health can be used as a story of hope to others. One less family in the race for bigger and better, means one more family using intentionality and purpose to bring about change.
I have missed writing to you all. Missed the community of like-minded people, and it is definitely good to be back!