Joy and perfectionism.
They are two different entities.
A twisted vine of lies, shame and sadness.
Perfectionism is defined as unachievable unexpections and the inability to be happy unless these high expectations are reached.
Perfectionism destroys our happiness.
It ravages self-esteem.
Encourages bitterness and resentment.
It steals our joy.
Perfection is unattainable. Growth is a journey.
Perfection leads to stagnation, the fear to start something new. A mindset of growth fosters new experiences and new challenges — the releasing the shame of failure, and instead of seeing failure as a journey.
Psychologists have found a strong correlation between a perfectionist mindset and mental health conditions such as anxiety, depression and low self-esteem. this illustrates quite how harmful this mindset is. It can steal your happiness and contribute to deliberating conditions.
As a Type A personality and someone who always wants to be in control, I have a daily struggle against perfection. My standards are unattainable. I struggle if my uni grades are not ‘perfect’ or when I’m working, and I do not reach the standard I want. But I want this shame and striving to stop.
I want to embrace the joy of failure and instead view 80% effort as enough. Instead of unachievable standards, create reasonable goals which foster self-love and self-acceptance. I have collected some affirmations which are going to look at each day and whenever I begin to set my standards too high. You also can use them, set them as your background on your phone, stick them on a post-it note on your mirror or computer.
- “Mistakes are a normal part of everyday life.”
- “Failure does not mean I an unworthy of love.”
- “I will celebrate both my failures and successes.”
- “Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look
- beyond the imperfections.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
- “It is better to try and made mistakes than stand at the sideline doing nothing.”
- “Being imperfect is what it means to be human.”
- “I don’t need to be a perfect parent, just a present parent.”